Friday, August 31, 2012

sea sick...

first off, let me tell ya about my sea sickness, well that's what I call it, though I haven't been on a boat in a few years, how 'bout motion sickness... so since my first fill I have been getting so sick in the car if I am driving or riding for longer than 10 minutes- it is awful, we went to the beach yesterday it was about an hour away, sick on the way there but nothing like the way home OMG I was dying I had my husband pull over on the highway so I could throw up for the first time in like years... horrible feeling with the lapband weird and kinda thought my eyes were gonna pop out of my head but they stayed in thank God.. lol.  So I went in for my 2nd fill today and told the N.P about the motion sickness I have been having and she did a barium swallow everything was fine and she did see that the 4.2cc gave me no restriction, so yadda yadda yadda I now have 7cc in my 14cc band,14ccs? yes 14!! "mini wtf"  my surgeon uses 14cc bands on everyone IDK why... anyways they think the motion sickness is just some water in my ear or something, nothing to do with my lapband or my fill just a kawinky dink that it started the day of my 1st fill... hmmm.

so hubby is still out of work, no $ from unemployment yet, they have a max of I think $650 per week plus $25 per week for each child lets see how long we can live on that (not very) and don't get me started on the health insurance at $1500 per month.... but other than all that crap it has been good having him home, we have done a few things as a family that we would have never been able to do this summer if not for him being out of work, and Johnny is loving having him home, though he does miss his nana who usually visits a few times a week, but not when hubby is home, she loves my hubby just does'nt get down with the visiting while he is home thing, old fashion house wife thingy going on, she thinks I will be busy bringing slippers and cold drinks to him hahaha ya right silly nana lol...

Yard sale tomorrow , selling lots of crap to make more room in the cellar for my "gym" I hope I sell it all, I do not want to bring it back in the house once it is out lol... free shit here after 2pm 2-moro lol

hope you are all well, I have been trying to jump on here and there the past week but have been kinda busy, I am quite jealous of those of you going to BOOBS and I can not wait to be there next year!  I bought a dress I would love to fit in for BOOBS 2013 .

oh BTW I am still at 248 WTF... better than 249 or 250 etc....... at this rate I will never be wearing the for mentioned dress...

ok ladies time for some iced coffee with just a splash of kahlua ..... have a great long weekend ...

Monday, August 27, 2012

pics...and not much else.. lol

Since my husband was laid off we have been trying to do some things together that we usually don't have time for during the summer because he is usually soooo busy at work. I have been happy having him home with us during the day ( so far lol) today we tool Johnny to the Library to get a few books and a "kit" which is 4 or 5 books on a subject along with a puppet, a puzzle, a musical component, and a dvd or music cd, so  like we today got "the farm kit"  in it we got 5 books about farms, and pigs, and hens... etc.. also a pig puppet who is very awesome, a farm chunky puzzle, wooden egg's that you shake, he loves those they are the musical bit, and a cd with farm-ish kids music.. I really love that our Library has these kits for toddlers! next time we will get the "bear kit"...

so anyways we took Johnny to the playground after the Library ...... not much else going on, no weight gain, no weight loss just staying at 248... ??? maybe because it is my T.O.M maybe after that joyous gift I will see that maybe I lost  wouldn't that be nice...  ok ladies ... here are some pics of me and my lil guy today , oh my hubby may be in a few too :O)   

OH AND IN OTHER NEWS, MY 2ND FILL IS FRIDAY!  because the first fill of 4.2 cc has really done nothing still on pure will power here and doing very well I gotta say, who knew.... I will be back in the mood to blog for a nice weigh in Wednesday this week, and a TTT and a 2nd fill post Friday so watch out I am back baby hahaha

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

more to come... this is just a few summer dishes.

here are some dishes I make very often, (tonight I am making the first 2 plus corn on the cob for dinner) they are some of my summer favs... just thought I would post them no big secret recipes lol mostly store bought ingredients, but yummy just the same, really fall recipes are my specialty and I am working on a post and a new "tab" on my blog for those and more recipes, that may or may not be band friendly hahaha

grilled lime chicken

2 chicken breast each cut into 3 big pieces, 2 if small breast

1.5 teaspoon of nellie and joes key lime juice

about 1 cup Newmans Own lite Caesar dressing

marinate for like 3 or 4 hours then grill to perfection! I love to serve (and eat) this Chicken with cranberry sauce.

Marinated garden tomatoes

 beautiful vine ripened garden tomatoes, or store bought (but please people do not refrigerate your tomatoes it really makes them horrible..)

Newmans lite Balsamic vinaigrette

sea salt (to taste)

fresh ground black pepper

fresh basil chopped

marinate for at least 2 hours, do not put in the fridge... I serve this all summer long with many meals and at every BBQ. these are also SO GOOD with this recipe below.

 Hot or cold pesto pasta

Barilla plus farfalle (1/2 box) ...*protein baby!*

2 teaspoons "classico" pesto (add more after mixing if desired)

parm cheese fancy shredded

1/2 - 3/4 cup of rotisserie chicken breast make this a nice delish meal too, but not so great cold for a bandster.

make sure the pasta is not wet before mixing the pesto and cheese into it. I usually splash a little of the " balsamic juice" from the marinated tomatoes in also but only after it has been mixed and the pesto is "sticking" to the pasta.....  oh and I would never eat or serve this without the tomatoes above.... that's how good they are together.

Monday, August 20, 2012

my first fill...(even though I am feeling like eeyore lol)

Friday started off ok, my mom was babysitting Johnny so that I could go see the PA at my surgeons office... she was late, and I could not get in touch with her soooo, I got Johnny ready just in case I had to take him with me (that would have been fun, my 22 month old running around while I have a needle in my belly) but I did finally get in touch and mom came just in time....

     So out the door I went, it is only about a ten minute drive to get to the office. Once I got there I sit in the waiting room reading the "eat this not that" book, I always read there (read? no,look at the pictures, like I am really going to remember lol) . now I ..wait wait  like maybe 5 minutes but there were teenage boys sitting in the waiting room waiting for someone and they were kinda pissing me off, being loud and just I hate punk teenagers lol... anywaysss..... I get in "the room" and Annmarie (the PA) says are you ready for your first fill? YES PLEASE! I was so happy that I did not have to sit and chat and blah blah for 10 mins before her putting me out of my misery of wondering if I was going to get "all filled up", though we did talk about how much I can eat and how often.. so..I get up on the table, she feels around and makes me do a crunch and suck in.. push out.., feely feely feel and then a lil pinch TA-DAAAAA easy peasy no pain no fishing with the needle,,,just in & out quickly put in 4.0 cc  I did have .2 cc in there (wtf why only .2 why not more or none hmm oh well) so there is now 4.2 cc in my 14 cc band... she said I will definitely need more, she could tell by the lack of resistance when she "squirted" the 4.2 cc's in she says prob like 3cc more in 2 weeks, then more 2 weeks after that .... so, now, do I feel any different ..... well I almost wanna say no, but really I do not feel hungry at all, I actually have to make myself eat, I make sure to eat breakfast and a lil lunch, but I just do not want dinner since my fill, I am all set with dinner yuck... lol  I have also had like motion sickness, not just plain ol' nausea, and I have a headache but I think that is unrelated to the fill.....

I guess that is all, nothing big.... oh except for the fact that when I got home form my fill all happy, my husband calls me and tells me he was laid off again, 3rd time in 3 years AWESOME!  so this is what I am dealing with right now.... so I may be a lil absent for a week or so just getting shit done, like health insurance etc....   have a great week peeps... miss ya!  I am still jumping on blogger and reading all "my buddies" posts, but sorry if I do not comment feeling a little like eeyore so not in a comment mood at times ... but thank you ladies! for all of your support, your comments, and your being there, it really does mean a lot... xoxo

Friday, August 17, 2012

well, what a day... smh

I wanted nothing more than to write an awesome post about my first fill today, but my husband got laid off today, 3rd time in 3 years!.... so, I am going to take a few days off from blogging :o( . I will be back with a lovely post about my first fill, and hopefully my hubby will have a new job (ya right, but ya never know..)

I'm on my way...

heading out the door soon, going to my surgeons office for a 11:30 appointment. I really hope I get my first fill today, now that I am thinking they didn't really say "hey next visit you get your fill", they just said we will see where you are at... so I am really hoping they fill 'er up, if not I will be so pissed and I will demand a fill ASAP... but I shall think positive for now..... wish me luck! oh I had a slice of cold pizza for b-fast so that was dumb! what the hell was I thinking.....

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

no fill today

no fill today people.....

Johnny has a fever, his Pedi doesn't need to see him unless it sticks around 'til Friday, but I just wanna stay home with my guy and snuggle him.....

so my new fill appointment is Friday the 17th at 1130. that is great cuz I did not want to have to wait much longer, goodness I have to get some restriction, the portions that I am eating are not really cutting it for 4 hours, but my loud belly will just have to be happy with what it gets and shut down the noise factory, it is so loud it is like "hey you, I wont be ignored! feed me, eat a pie will ya!"  speaking of pies, Fall is coming my Fav!!!!

Tuesday, August 14, 2012

first fill, maybe???

my lil guy is up with a fever of 101.6... so this is a quickie...

2-moro I go see my surgeon and I should be getting my first fill!!! I really hope I get it. for some reason I am starting to just feel like it isnt gonna happen IDK why..

I am feeling great about my loss so far, am actually under 250 lbs ( 248) and that makes me happy....but with my fill I know I will be losing more and with a little less will power required...

talk 2-moro ...

UPDATE!!!   Johnnys fever was 103.5 at 6 am.... so I have to cancel my appt. and take him to see the Pediatrician.  he doesn't seem to have a cold or flu or any ear infection or UTI, it must be viral and he is fighting it off but I just want to have him seen.. my poor lil guy. at first the other day when it was a low grade fever I blamed his teething, he is getting some molars and has always had fevers with teething, but now since yesterday it has been getting higher, so not the teeth. he is just laying on the love seat watching curious George with his sippy cup of milk, binky and a lil airplane being an angel.

I hope my surgeons office can reschedule my first fill asap!! it stinks I have to miss it but I would not want to leave my poor feverish guy with my inlaws, he is all about his mama when he is sick....

Saturday, August 11, 2012


I am happy to announce that those 2 pounds are gone, must have been water weight, from those chicken fingers... those 2 pounds are gone for good, adios 2 pounds, adios.....  

I am getting very excited for my fill!!! Wednesday! ya baby....

Thursday, August 9, 2012

my first TTT... I can do it too, right?

ok so I am going to attempt my first 10 things Thursday....

1.) I had a gain of 2 pounds!!! wtf.. I know my TOM is coming but seriously I am sooo down because of this, I did not do much exercise this week and I ate Chinese food, ( 2 chicken fingers) but I am going to move forward and bust my ass this week...
2.) I feel like a porka, because of the 2 pounds I put back on my body, and I am trying to focus on how to get these pounds plus more off soon, but it is hard not to beat myself up, I let myself down, I was so proud maybe even feeling like "ya thats right I got this no sweat", but look at me now- a 2 pound porkier porka. now I realize it takes work, hard work complete focus and no slip ups not even 1 bad choice, it is going to take my all for me to get where I want to be this time next year (or even next week)
3.) ok ok I will move forward.... I have made a promise to myself... I will focus on my goal from morn - night, exercise daily!! , and eat the right things ALWAYS.
4.) I have been buying clothing in lots of different sizes at my favorite thrift store and I hang them up in the cellar, when I need some motivation I make up lil outfits and hang them together... I need a mannequin lol
5.) Julie the dandy bandy mentioned the other day that she cant wait to show her style... me too!! I really have always had style but you would never know because as a porka I have either dressed in stretch pants with a jersey shirt from the fat lady section or my pajamas... I cant wait to actually buy and were something that I LOVE! I cant wait to actually look my best! and feel that way too...
6.) I was really starting to feel old, I think that is what started my thinking about WLS from the start, I was just starting to feel like an invisible momma, one of those people who you cant really guess their age but you know they are definitely not young, or funny or cool at all and that is not me, as you well know, I am quite cool haha ok maybe not cool but I am not old thats for sure! - I am only 35 baby !! now my Hubby he is old haha 45...
7.) speaking of my hubby, I am still trying to talk him into the band, I really hope he does it, if not WLS I would settle for him just losing, any way he feels comfortable with, but losing! before I lose him, I really do worry about that... he is a hard worker and a big guy, kinda a scary mix...
8.) I cant wait for my fill, I really feel like my will power is getting a lil less powerful... ya memba the 2 pound gain folks...
9.) I am working on setting up a home gym in my cellar, I have decided that it is the best choice for me, a person with agoraphobia should not pay over $800 to join the Y... the anxiety it would cause is something I am not ready to deal with and it would really make me get into a "fuck it" kind of mind set... we dont want that do we? no we dont. so home gym!! I am excited for it! ordering some things this w/e tax free baby! and doing other stuff while I wait... like walking and my xbox workout (fitness evolved)
10.) did I mention the 2 pound gain... ok just checking ....WTF the porka inside has struck again, that lazy chicken finger eating biaatch!

oh and I should thank Laura Belle... for TTT.
 I always enjoy reading my peeps's's's TTTs and I enjoyed my first time... was it good for you? lol

Monday, August 6, 2012

ok, i didnt get a pic again today sooo here are a few from the good and the bad

I was maybe 18 that a brownie lol

this one is on our honeymoon


  my baby shower 2010- 8 months pregnant.

 December 2010

^ this I hate this one, 2011 spring...


1 month bandiversary


WOW I can not believe it has been 1 month since my surgery, I really thought the weeks from surgery to my fill were going to be harder. I thought I was not going to lose any weight during these weeks, but I have I have to say I am very proud of myself, the things that I anticipated being the hardest have been surprisingly easier for me than had imagined, and those things are....
  • not drinking with my meals or for 15 min. before and 1+1/2 -2 hours after.
  • eating breakfast (I was not big on bfast, coffee yes, food no)
  • chewing my dice sized bites at least 22 times (per surgeons orders)
  • taking the time to do something for me, like this blog, myfitnesspal, etc..

I will be taking some pictures today! and more pictures from now on, I just think that is what my blog is missing at times.

I want to thank all of you, I truly feel like a part of this community, and I am so happy that I decided to start this blog. I was so afraid that I would be "talking" to myself, that what I had to say would not be of any interest to anyone, and that my posts would be boring and not informative at all for the people who are lurking while trying to make the decision to get banded ( like I did while while deciding) this blog is for me of course, but honestly I do want to help someone if I can and I do love the support and sisterhood I feel from you all. thanks girlios!! you rock! and lurkers if you have any questions for me please comment please follow, and please start your own blog there is so much about this blogging thing that a lurker just does not get to experience and benefit from.
okay I am starting to ramble.... pics soon!

my lil scale pimp

so quickie post to tell you about my crazy lil guy....

this is the second morning in a row that my 22 month old has walked into the bathroom, pulled the scale out from under the pedestal sink stepped on it and sighed lol he is so funny.....

ok so I promised pics for my 1 month bandiversary and I do promise they are coming today at some point,most likely when the lil guy goes down for a nap.  I love blogs with pics and I feel so guilty loving something about another blog that I do not do on my own... so I have also decided to post some recipes that are great for banded moms and wives who have to feed everyone and only want to cook one thing!!  I will post 1 or 2 a month with pics and all... also just more pics in general.

okay peeps have a great Monday!!

Thursday, August 2, 2012

yesterdays weigh in...

yesterday was Wednesday, weigh in day, and I had an appointment at my surgeons office, with the N.P....... It went well, we talked for 45 min. about food choices and the can and can nots. My and should and should nots. My weight was 251, so that was really awesome news, I thought for sure it would have been the same as last week or higher, I mean I have been good, and even exercising, but I just thought my portions where not great. I guess with an empty band my portions were right where the should be. 3 pound loss = doing something right lol I do feel like I could do better, not that 3 pounds isn't awesome, do I expect to lose more than that in a week, no not really, but I know I can do more exercise and I just have to do it!, also NO MORE DRINKING WITH MY MEALS!!! or for an 1.5 hours after. that starts today ( here is where I say to myself "yes porka, today")   

I asked the nurse practitioner about my first fill, I wanted to know if they would not give me one yet since I am losing, but she said it is (in their practice) based on post meal time hunger, if I am hungry within 4 hours of eating, also if my portions seem to be bigger than they want them to be in order to get satisfaction not FULL (do not eat to get full eat to get satisfied, if it is enough stop, der why didn't someone tell me that long ago lol), so anyways.. I expect my first fill on or right after August 15th, I cant wait... for know I am going to really keep track of my meals and hunger and be a good banded mama and not drink with meals (not even a sip, porka)

I gotta join the Y, can you believe I haven't even applied yet, WTF am I waiting for lol... I get in exercise, but I have to do more and just join already, I think it is the fact that I will be using the childcare while I workout, for my 22 month old and I am a lil anxious about has to be that because I truly am excited to get going on the workouts, I cant wait really.

well peeps, I hope you are all well. hey and HELLO to my new followers, lol I lost 1 and gained 3 AWESOME lol  oh and leave me your url (?) if I dont follow you already... thanks babes

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

a few random things..

1.) I wish that at least one of you blogging buddies lived in Massachusetts... seems like most of my peeps are not even close to New England... boohoo
2.) I really cant wait for my first fill, and I hope my surgeon isn't stingy with the saline... or I will kick him in the nuts (in my head thousands of times on the drive home).
3.) why does my 22 month old feel the need to head butt me awake in the morning, yes he sleeps in our bed- I have maybe 18" of space in our queen size bed, but I do love to snuggle him.
4.)today is my weigh in day and I forgot to weigh myself  when I woke up and will do that next pee trip upstairs.. and tell you here .........  ***251**** lbs *** 3 ****lbs lost!!! since last week.
5.) I really want a hair cut, but have no idea what to do with it, also I want to color it I have been letting it grow out for 3 years and have not colored it, but the gray hairs are starting to really make me look like.. well I don't know what, but bad! also I need an eyebrow wax. soooo make overtime... I will post pics.

oh and 6. I really really really wish my hubby would get banded, I hope to talk him into it in time for surgery this Fall when his work slows down a bit and he can take some time off, fingers crossed...